Its raining...Its pouring...

I  wish i was...SNORING! :)


July 24th, 2010...

Oh how this trip just keeps Turing into even more of a crazy, wilderness adventure.  Its either I laugh…or I cry. I have been trying to laugh! But I have definitely had my cries.

The browns left two days ago to head home, and that was sad for me, because they have been so great to me this summer and have keep me company. Its really quiet around here now! Its alright though, because we have to realize that fishing is coming to an end, and its time for us to do the things necessary to get ready to head home ourselves.

Don’t get me wrong, this has been an experience of a lifetime…but like most things, it has to come to an end. Well…some days I feel like its not coming to an end soon enough! The guys stopped fishing yesterday, and we have until Wed. to tear down camp. This means we have to tear down two cabins and move gear and such. It doesn’t sound too bad, but it’s the end of the fishing season, and we are all pretty exhausted…so tearing down stuff doesn’t seem all that fun.  We started teardown yesterday (Sat) and are supposed to leave camp on Wednesday (it was supposed to be Monday, but because of teardown we extended it)

However, we have had exceptional weather this summer (so I am told) Both caleb and the browns (his fam…the next cabin over to us) say that I brought the sun with me from California…I am SO ok with that! (and plus…God knew I needed sun for my own sanity…and for the guys) So yesterday, we took down the cook cabin…where its warm, and I cook…and have most of our stuff. It took the guys all day to do it, just in time for the rain to come. And it has not stopped raining. We looked at the forecast and its supposed to RAIN till…WEDNESDAY!

You know, I love rain….BUT I only love rain when… I am sleeping. So…I have been trying not to be a Grumpy Gertrude or a Cranky Cathy. Now that we don’t have a cook cabin…this means we don’t have a stove, or oven….or a fireplace…or a covering when we eat. So...we are under a tarp…cooking on a grill…playing games.Oh the fun. Josh and I still get to sleep in a nice cabin (called the nest…don’t worry,pics will come up to explain when I get home)where its warm! As far as food and throughout the day living…I had to plan out meals so we could last till Wednesday and I already forgot some of the major things like…extra cups…or silverware.

Today was a laughing instead of crying moment. We woke up (at least I slept in till 8!) went outside…got soaked with rain, and then I started to make pancakes. The stove took forever to heat…and so as I poured the batter onto the pan….i realized…I didn’t have a spatula to flip them. So…I used a piece of cardboard and a fork. We laughed about it. So…rain+me=not so good.

So…please pray that the weather dies down a lil, because if its stormy by Wednesday…then we have to wait till its better. Ha. Good thing Caleb stored extra chocolate for me…our joke is…if I get grumpy, he’ll throw a candy bar my way so I calm down. Ha.

Its not all bad! Its been quite the adventure, and I will remember this forever. I realized how blessed I am to come out here with my hubby and with Caleb who is practically a brother to me. There are not a lot of people that I would want to spent that much time with!

For Monday night and Tuesday night, we are all sleeping in a tent. We all haven’t showered since two days ago…and don’t have a shower till we leave. Oh Lord. …Two smelly boys + small living AND sleeping space+ cans of beans (that’s all we haaavvee) =a possible recipe for death for a woman.

So…just pray that we laugh a lot (we already have been…its REAL camping now) and remember that this was a great experience and also remember that we will be home soon!

7 days till we are back in Redding. In a way I am sad that I am leaving…but I am definitely ready to be home!

Love you all!!

Oh…p.s..because I had some time today… I calculated this.

I have been in Alaska for: 45 days...
Been at fishcamp for: 40
Total days at fishcamp: 43
Total days in Alaska : 52

I realized today that when this trip is done...  I will have cooked and cleaned (give or take a couple days here and there...this is just an estimate)


3 meals a dayX 43=129
Cleaned dishes by hand 3 times a dayX43  meals a day=129

Thats a lot of cookin' and cleaning! I think i would be ok to say that when i get home...I am gunna take a break :)

Time flys by when...

When u r havin fun in alaska!
Wow.
Here we are, the 17th of july! Where did the time go? It definitley went by fast but there were many daya where thet felt as if thet never ended, especially with it always being light here.

I was journaling today and realized we have 8 more daya at fishcamp and then 5 more days in girdwood before heading back to redding. So many words oir pictures cannot ex press what I have been through...good things,hard things,challending,stretching and rewarding things that I dont think would happen outside this experience. I am definitley exhausted but ready to still push,through and enjoy this last week.

On the 13th if this month, tobey (calebs dad) came out with two friends from redding,a father named randy and his daughter named jen. They stayed for a week andwere great company! I was just gettinf used to cook for three hungry men(caleb,toby,josh) and then I was cookin'for 6! They helped me every time with the dishes tho...that saved my life! Randy was quite the hoot...he helped me peel the fresh shrimp,clean them (de-vein) and boil shrimp! Which wereveryyyyyuummmy,in case u were wondering. Jen was super sweet and showed me adorable pictures ifher two sons will and jack. I showed her wedding pictures.bey took all of us to see the beautiful glacier inbetween mountains called nelly wan (sp?) It was this massive glacier that had been formed over thousands of years! ( ill post pics when I get home,from the phtos taken with our camera.) There was a hiking spot up the side of the glacier that was obviously on the side of the mountain sowe could get a better view. We sW chunks fall and heard them splash, which was pretty awesome! We had a picnic up top,on a beautiful sunny day.

One of my fav. Moments in alaska for sure. There were also clearwater ponds up in the mountains,and yes,u guessed it, josh and caleb jumped in! I was lactually bumed I didnt bring my bathing suit..but Jen had the greatest idea...why dont we leave and u and josh...yes...i am going to say it...Skinny dip! (we r married..ok? ) so while everyone else climed further down..we laughed,jumped in,screamed because it was freezing glacier water,and jumped right out! Number 2
on a great alaskan moment haha!
We have had a few accidents while being here, of course most of them happen to me...i fell down pretty hard on my bumm on our hike to the glacier anad have a big bruise to prove it!.
I also hada real scare with our oolld oven. Apparently it was lit with prpane,but it didnt,catch the flame. So for about a half hour prpane had been running. I didnt know this,so iwent to l
ight it and tjis huge ball if fire came rolling out towards my face.,thank the lord, my head was ttturned.,but the right side of my hair was burned,not all! And my eyelShand eyebrowsr singed A

lil bit :( moral of thestory? Dont let a man light the old stove. ha. Jk,but really. oh accidents.anywho..hopefully I will blog again,but these are just some highlights.

Its been beautiful here.,im enjoying the mountains around me...and taking this adventure for all its worth. Live u all,and I get to see u soon!

Happy 4th of July!!

Happy 4^th of July Everyone!

Ha. Last night, we went to bed to the sound of people throwing fireworks off their boats.  You see, practically any type of firecracker is allowed here….so you know…fire crackers and boys= pure BLISS!  There is this one especially called Seal bombs (no…they are not used to kill seals. They are just a bigger type of firecracker) Today the guys got excited and threw one in the water and yelped after it exploded.  A few days ago we (meaning the guys, not me) put one inside a soda can and it blew it to pieces. Ha. Oh boys.

Before coming to Alaska, I was excited for the 4^th…but then I forgot that it never gets dark here! Ha…so fireworks are still fun, but definitely not the same.

I was reflecting on this exact time last year and Josh and I had been married for about two weeks. I remember feeling so tan and fit.  We spent most of the night laughing with our close friends, Jess and Tim and Lib and Jess’s friend Rachel while we watched fireworks by Sequoia school. I remember sharing and reminiscing about our wedding day because it was so fresh in my mind and how it was one of the best days ever.

Today as I sit here while it rains and the boys are fishing for most of the day, I first thought of that memory and became a lil sad.  Last year this day we didn’t know then what was lied ahead of us, or how changed out lived would be. We didn’t know what was to come! (but aren’t we so thankful that we don’t?) I mean, we have had a wonderful first year together, but it has also been super hard. This includes Just dealing with how to live with one another, communication as well as a lot of family issues that was going to weigh on our shoulders. But, knowing what I know now, I would never take this first year back because it has made me stronger as a woman and a wife, let alone a sister, daughter, friend…etc.

I also reminisced about this time last year while working on scrapbooking my wedding album (yes…I just started…this is one of my goals to get mostly done while I am here!) I was looking at wedding pictures, and looking back on how hard I worked out for that day and became more sad and then frustrated. I began to pray and ask the Lord to help me get over this “image” I had of myself and how I should look this way, should eat better, or should i? …blah blah blah.

I then realized it’s so toxic to think this way. One of the best things on this trip has helped me strip my negative self-image. I don’t have a full length mirror to look at my outfits in; I don’t have a hairdryer, makeup (ok …just mascara and tinted moisturizer but I hardly wear it!) curling iron, flat iron, let alone cute outfits, I’m in the dang wilderness!(what was I thinking? Ha-ha)  I didn’t realize that this has been one of the biggest hardships for me. I have always been self-conscious about my awful skin. But the only mirror we have is in the cooking cabin and its tiny (of course, boys live here). I shower every three or four days (and camping without a shower for that long is brutal…but at least I have a shower!!) My hair is an afro when I wake up and I wear dirty clothes because I have to wait for the sun to come out to do clothes by hand. But honestly, I have been finding that being a servant to Josh and Caleb, loving myself and NOT caring is way more beautiful than anything I could wear. I know that sounds simple, but it’s the hardest thing, I think especially for a woman.  I have been making big, hearty meals for the guys and of course eat some myself, and then I start freaking out if I have gained any weight. My goodness, our minds can be such war zones to who we REALLY are! Such lies, and yet so easy to believe.  I am wonderfully and beautifully made. Who cares about my hair, or my makeup? Really! And I have found myself not even looking the mirror lately, thinking about my weight or caring what I look like. I am blessed because every day my husband tells me I am breathtakingly beautiful. That he is so thankful that I am supporting him. Those words and the heart behind those words alone are worth more than any makeup to make cover my insecurities...

Sorry that I am venting but this has been on my heart the whole time. I know that this has been one of the things that God is trying to strip me free of. To free me from being captive to my negative thoughts or reminiscing on how I think I should look. Don’t get me wrong, I need to take care of my body, and that is worth it! J

So…all to say, I remember this time last year, and it makes me miss my close friends, but instead of making me sad that I don’t look “as good” as I did, I rejoice because I am only who I can be today. One day at a time and CHOOSE to not believe these lies. I am in Alaska for heaven’s sake, with a man who loves me and could care less about what i look like and with a God who wants to mold me into a beautiful woman, not on the outside, but to the very core…to my heart. And this is worth more than anything to me.

Sooo. Yeah. The sun is poking through right now, so I am going to read, or skip….or do nothing if I want. Sigh. And I am so okay with that.

Love you all.